


Snowdrop

by eternalmurasaki



Category: Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, LobbySecretSanta, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:02:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,321
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28202796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eternalmurasaki/pseuds/eternalmurasaki
Summary: Prompt: First Christmas together in their placeWarning : this is not an EstablishedRelationship fic but I hope you will still like it ❤25/12 note : Merry Christmas ❤Sincere apologies for not finishing this on time but the ending will be posted very soon ❤Thank you for your understanding ❤
Relationships: Javier Fernández/Yuzuru Hanyu
Comments: 8
Kudos: 21





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [FatyGSquare](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FatyGSquare/gifts).



This had been supposed to be a perfect holiday. Javier had come to Japan to watch musicals, his intention being to learn how the Japanese choreographed their musical theater. Ever since Javier was a student, he had admired the wide range of theater production that occurred in Japan and had hoped that he would one day get to see it with his own eyes. His boss happened to approve of his interest and had helped him plan what was supposed to be a dream-come-true trip.

Except 2020 happened.

So here he is, stuck in his Airbnb with all shows cancelled or postponed. Japan hasn't implemented confinement measures but it is probably only a question of time. Confinement or not, Javier isn't inclined to step outside much in these circumstances and regrets all of his decisions.

***

Javier has been working for musicals played at Gran Vía for the past two years. The experience still feels new and he feels blessed for the opportunities he has had so early in his career.

His family often likes to joke that the mishap that happened the first time he was at Gran Vía must have made the Spanish Broadway director decide that Javier needed some tight guidance.

Javi squirms at the memory. 

The first time he'd met Brian Orser, he'd been waiting in the entry hall for it to be the time of his interview. He had rushed there from his day job and had barely caught his breath.

"Javier Fernandez?" a voice had said behind him right after he'd taken a huge bite out of his sandwich. 

Messing up his first sentence to _the_ Brian Orser himself with his mouth full is, to this day, one of Javier's most embarrassing memories. But Brian had laughed it off and Javier had breathed.

Two years later, Brian had approached him with an interesting proposition.

"My dear friend Nobunari Oda has told me they have some musicals with amazing choreographies coming up in his theater, I can get you tickets, I think you should go. It would be nice for you to see something different from your personal style."

Of course Javier had said yes.

***

During his first week in Tokyo, Javier partly ignores the turn of events because the situation seems somewhat in control so far. He enjoys walks in area surrounding the flat he's staying in and remains glad to discover what Tokyo is like.

However the cancellation of the first shows makes him start to muse about potential staycation activities. He wakes up early one morning to go to Tower Records at its opening hour to see if they have DVDs featuring his favorite choreographers and dancers. He might as well enjoy nice shows on the Airbnb's huge TV screen if he will need to stay inside. Just the thought of seeing Yuna Kim and Miki Ando in HD makes him flip out his credit card with no hesitation.

Throughout the following week, Javier sticks to more spacious places and explores beautiful parks. Christmas decorations start to be put up and he discovers the preparation for this end-of-the-year celebration under a whole new perspective. 

His Airbnb contact, Nobunari Oda, recommends that he taste Japan's KFC Christmas specialty but Javier doesn't feel like making a reservation at this stage. He isn't even sure yet whether he will still be in Japan for Christmas or not - if all the shows get cancelled he might as well change his flight & go home. He'd rather be there if one of them stays on.

He however later regrets his hesitation.

When his favorite show gets cancelled,   
finding a flight to get back home becomes a nightmare. After being jostled from one waiting list to another, he gives up.

2020 sucks and he'll spend Christmas alone in Tokyo.

***

On December 20, his disappointment starts to hit him hard. Javier hates being stuck here, hates spending Christmas away from his family. His dark mood makes him angrily google if there is any good paella in Tokyo - sadly, none of the pictures he finds online convince him.

He has already watched his Yuna Kim and Miki Ando DVDs way too many times, so he dismisses all sense of responsibility and orders Suntory Whiskey. Watching Lost in Translation while drinking Suntory will make a nice tale for his friends.

_For relaxing times, make it Suntory time,_ they said. Relaxing is exactly what he needs when this situation is starting to get on his nerves. 

Why does his first trip to Japan have to be like this?!

***

Two hours later, he has downed 3 glasses already and is considering ordering noodles.

***

Three hours later he has drunk more than necessary and falls asleep still fully dressed. Because what's the point? His clothes are comfy and no one is here to judge him.

This could have stayed a somewhat normal tipsy night, aside from the fact that he'd been drinking alone... but around 2am, he is having one of the strangest dreams.

Because why the hell would someone suddenly turn on the light in his room?

Javier groans and turns around in his bed to face the wall instead of the damn light.

It takes him a few seconds to realize that someone is angry, in Japanese too.

He turns back around and squints at the newcomer, with dread in his stomach.

This isn't a dream, is it? 

Regaining consciousness hurts. Javier curses.

"Who are you and what the hell are you doing here?!"

No, this is not a dream.

This is a nightmare.


	2. Chapter 2

It is 4am and Javier thinks this person would need to have some Suntory Time himself. Because relaxing is the furthest from what he's doing.

The man had left the room as soon as Javier had said that he'd reserved the Airbnb through his boss' friend. "We'll talk tomorrow morning," he'd said but Javier can still hear him angrily talking to 'Nobu' on the phone.

 _Great_. As if his trip had needed to get worse. Javier sighs and groggily gets up. The least he can do is change into his pyjamas.

The alcohol's effect has started to grow dimmer, so his senses make him realise that it would be a good idea for him to message Nobunari Oda himself to tell him what just happened. If the intruder is calling him 'Nobu' on the phone, Javier wants to believe that he is safe but he better be precautious. He holds onto that sliver of hope and falls asleep before his message gets a reply.

***

The next morning, when Javier steps into the living room, he spots a folded duvet on the couch and an open suitcase on the floor with a shit-ton of... are those earphones?? Who the hell needs so many??

Javier however rushes to make a neutral face when he hears footsteps coming from the kitchen.

"Javier Fernandez? I'm Yuzuru, nice to meet you."

Javier hesitantly smiles - it's hard to do so when Yuzuru's face is cold, despite his polite words. Javi reaches out to shake his hand but his smile falters when Yuzuru steps back. 

"Covid."

Of course. Now Javier feels stupid.

"You are totally right. I got tested, though. I haven't been to busy places since I was here."

Yuzuru sighs - Javier hopes it's partly from relief?

"Are you not going to ask if I got tested?"

Javi's eyebrows slide up in surprise.

"You're not giving me much time-"

Yuzuru purses his lips and apparently decides the conversation is over.

What a great start.

***

When Javier turns on his phone, he sees that he has missed a call from Nobunari Oda who has left a message full of apologies. Apparently Yuzuru lives here and there had been some misunderstanding on their dates. Nobunari swears that Yuzuru's flight back to Japan was over 2 weeks ago and that he has spent those 2 weeks isolating safely in a suburb where he had work obligations.

Javier's head hurts. When did renting a flat become this complicated?? He remembers that a lot of people had issues with Airbnb reservations a few years ago, after a legislation change, but apparently this particular trip was destined to be doomed too.

Last night he was depressed, and now he's irritated. Covid is one thing, but this here is a human mistake that shouldn't even exist.

He texts Brian and goes to take a shower to calm down.

_'Is your friend Nobunari trust-worthy? Because I hate him right now.'_

***

For the next few days, Yuzuru and Javier ignore each other. The Spaniard had offered to give Yuzuru his room back and take the couch instead but the man had refused.

The result is that Javier spends most of the time in bed, wondering how the hell he could make his time useful. At first he watches videos that inspire him on youtube and hopes that he will get new choreography ideas - he might as well work if he's stuck.

"How are you doing?" Brian asks, two days after Javier's ill-fated encounter.

"How well do you think I'm doing Brian? This is hell."

Javier suspects that the word must have spread, because that night there is a knock on his door. Javier steps out of bed and briefly checks that he looks presentable.

Yuzuru is standing there looking unusually uncomfortable. Where did his cold shoulder vibe go?

"I made dinner for two. Do you want- ?"

Javier blinks. Is he hearing this right?

"Oh, so you can stand being in the same room as me now?" he jokes, but his voice doesn't come out as light as intended.

Yuzuru blushes and Javier takes note that he looks very different when he isn't angry. The poor boy suddenly looks ten years younger and Javier takes pity on him.

"I'm joking. I'd love to, thank you."

A few minutes later, they are seated and this is one of the most awkward dinners Javier has ever had. He can tell that Yuzuru feels bad, but Javier doesn't feel entirely sorry for him. Let this be a life lesson for him.

"What food do you usually like to eat?" he asks, for the sake of conversation.

Yuzuru seems surprised that he even wants to talk after everything that has happened.

"Hmm... I don't often feel like eating. I eat because I have to."

Oh. What is Javier supposed to say to that? He starts to worry whether he's stepped into dangerous territory. Turning something into a joke is always a good way out though, right?

"Maybe I could change your mind with paella. I'm good at it, everyone who has ever tasted it agrees it's delicious."

He feels like a kid when he realizes he's puffed his chest with pride. The other man is staring at him with wide eyes and suddenly snorts.

"I don't even know what paella is."

Javier's jaw drops.

"No... no, no, no. This is not okay. I'll make paella for you before I leave."

Yuzuru squirms in his seat and avoids his gaze. The kid is blushing again - how the hell can someone go from stone cold to _this_?? Javier ignores the warm feeling in his chest. Tries to ignore the way his brain is spelling out _adorable_. Because Yuzuru hasn't been nice to him, he doesn't deserve-

"I don't deserve this, Fernandez. I treated you so bad. I'm sorry."

Did Javier say he wouldn't feel sorry for him? His determination is fraying... 

Hearing Yuzuru himself say he's undeserving makes his attempt to stay neutral fail. It's human to make mistakes. It's rather unsettling the way someone's demeanor can make one's impression make a 180 degree turn.

 _I told you he's too adorable to stay cold-_  
Javi tries to stomp his foot on that unwelcome thought.

"It's alright. I would be angry too."

"I'm very sorry, Fernandez."

Javier waves it off. _Even the way saying your name seems to cost him a lot of effort is adorable_. Can Javier's brain shut up?

"Call me Javi."

They can have a fresh start. There is still time to make this Christmas good. And alright, he's a kid, Javier is allowed to think he's cute.

"Call me Yuzu, then" the man says, lips twitching into a hesitant smile.

_Yuzu is not a kid._


	3. Chapter 3

"So what do you do in life?" Javi asks over breakfast the next day. The sun is shining through the windows, the hot chocolate smells amazing and Javi can say he is now content to be here. Sure, this Christmas will be unusal, but it will be an interesting experience.

"I'm a sound designer."

Suddenly, the massive collection of earphones makes sense.

"Oh. Do you work for Mr Oda?"

For some mysterious reason, Yuzu snorts.

"One could say that. But it's a long story."

Javi is curious but thinks he's probably not in the right position to ask for more details.

The conversation is quick to flow naturally after that. Even more so when Yuzu picks up Javi's Yuna Kim DVD case, eyes alight.

"You like Yuna Kim?" Javi asks, glad that they might have some common ground.

"I love her," Yuzu says and Javi tries to ignore the way he finds the way he holds the "L" longer than necessary adorable. 'Adorable' should be banned from his brain's vocabulary from now on. "Artistically, I mean," Yuzu adds.

Javier snorts.

"You're allowed to have a crush on her, I won't judge. When I was a teenager I enjoyed watching Miki Ando _too much_ , if you know what I mean."

Yuzu blinks. Uh, maybe that kind of declaration isn't considered politically correct in Japan.

"Um... I mean. Respectfully, of course," Javi stammers. So he's the awkward one now, huh?

"I'm not a teenager Javi, I'm 26."

...Good to know.

"So, you stopped _respectfully_ watching Miki when you turned 18, is that it? Why stop?" he jokes.

Okay, so maybe Yuzu is less innocent than he thought?

No, that's not possible. He's pretty sure Yuzu didn't get how dirty Javi's innuendo had been and Javi doesn't feel like explaining what he meant right now. The boy - _man_ , his brain corrects - probably still has innocent eyes.

And Javi will stop that potential train of thoughts before it goes anywhere.

***

"How come you are so familiar with the dance scene?" Javi asks the next day, as he is looking through Yuzu's DVD collection.

When Yuzu sees that he's looking he abruptly panicks and snatches a few DVDs off the shelf, which makes Javi snort.

"What are you hiding there, Yuzu?"

"Something private," he says in all seriousness but Javi can't help laughing even more.

"Ok, keep your secrets."

They don't spend their whole time together. Yuzuru has work to do, he says as he edits a piece of music on his software, 3 pairs of earphones next to his computer. Seeing Yuzu absorbed into his task as if it was his favorite thing in the world makes Javier's motivation to work on his choreographies come back. He returns to 'his' room, because he needs some personal space to focus.

During lunch that day, they talk about what kind of music they enjoy, professionally, but also in their free time. Javi isn't that surprised at the difference between their pro and hobby tastes.

"When we work, we're in a special head space. It makes sense..."

Yuzu looks however thoughtful after that.

"I think I just... combine all my head spaces? Like... different music is like a different language. But two languages can still have a compatible feeling."

Javi has to say he's impressed with Yuzuru's ability to express elaborate thoughts like that in English.

"How do you combine them? Like... is this about making a remix?"

Yuzuru hums thoughtfully again and Javi waits patiently. This is interesting even for him, as a choreographer. The use of sound is so important in art, and luck has put him here with an expert

Yes, _luck_.

Javi might not be able to see the shows he had planned to see, but this is a great opportunity for him to learn a couple of things that could help him compose a dance from a new perspective.

"I like listening to something that gives me energy before. I can't really explain."

Ok, maybe it's less philosophical than what Javi thought. Or maybe Javi should stop tiring him with questions.

***

Yuzu also sometimes asks him questions. He's curious about how Javi creates a choreography. About what inspires him and how he manages to convert that into moves.

That afternoon, he asks Javi to show him which of his choreographies is his favorite. At that Javi feels unexpectedly nervous... he isn't famous world-wide, but the top dancers _are_ starting to know his name. So Yuzu's opinion shouldn't matter that much to him.

But it does.

Sure, they have only known each other for a few days, but Yuzu has already left a big impression on him. And Javi wants Yuzu to like him.

Javi holds his breath and plays a video of Malaguena. He tried not to stare at Yuzu's eyes in an attempt to decipher his opinion.

He bites his lip and Yuzu must have noticed because he pats his forearm and says, "I like it, Javi. Lovely atmosphere."

Javi is relieved but Yuzu's next words make the moment of relief short-lived. "But what I want to see is a video of _you_ dancing to it."

At that, Javi bursts out laughing.

"I'm not a dancer, Yuzu. Would you ask David Wilson to do Patrick Chan's choreo's?"

Yuzu is smirking and Javi suddenly doesn't know what to expect.

"Not David Wilson, but I certainly would ask Stephane Lambiel to dance to _Two Men In Love_."

Javi tries not to splutter but his mind is reeling. Does Yuzu mean-

Javi is now breathless for a whole new reason. But maybe he shouldn't read too much into this.

He playfully sighs and takes his phone back to find the video of himself he'd sent to the intended dancer.

"Alright... here you go. But my dancing is clumsy. I took dancing lessons but... I'm not-"

"Shh. Let me watch."

Javi nods and licks his lips nervously. He can't help it, he lets himself watch Yuzu's reaction this time because he _needs to know_.

Yuzu is smiling gently at the screen.

And then Javi just knows. His brain doesn't need to tease him again, the way his heart is thumping in his chest is saying it all.

Ugh, he's really is doomed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Check the notes if you want to get a warning.

December 24 is here and Javier realizes that he doesn't even know when the Japanese celebrate Christmas. Do they do it on December 24th at night like some European countries or do they celebrate it on the 25th? Maybe now would be a good time to ask Yuzu if he has any plans. Maybe he has a special someone he intends to meet-up with... Javier's stomach sinks at the thought. He knows it's selfish but he hopes they will spend this celebration together.

If not, well Javier will use these emotions to create something. Feeling blue can come in useful for some tragedy-oriented dances.

When he steps out of his room, the apartment is quiet. Maybe Yuzu isn't up yet? Javier has noticed that he has a tendency to wake up late. He bets the young man stays on his computer until late at night editing stuff. Javier will have to ask him to show him some of his work at some point - that would only be fair.

He's quietly heading to the kitchen to avoid waking Yuzu up when he notices soft sounds coming from outside. It's snowing! He pauses in front if the window, enjoying the sight of snowflakes gently covering the street. It makes him wish he could spend the day curled next to fireplace with mulled wine, but they sadly don't have a fireplace.

The clock is ticking so he decides to get on the move. There's no wine in this flat but a coffee will do. However once he reaches the kitchen's doorstep, he discovers he wasn't the only one awake watching the snow fall. He's about to step in but he freezes when he sees Yuzu wipe his eyes.

The man is sitting on the windowsill, a thick gown on top of his pyjamas. The only moves he makes are to blow over his warm mug, take a sip and go back to absently looking outside.

Absently, because Javi sees him close his eyes and not re-open them when more teardrops silently glide down his cheeks.

Javi's heart clenches. He wishes he could do something to put a smile back on his face, but this looks like it's personal. He steps back and slowly heads back to his room.

***

Javier takes off his earphones. He can't focus, there's no point trying to get work done. He's tempted to go have breakfast but he doesn't want to risk intruding. Then again, if he stays away for much longer it will start to look fishy.

He's about to step outside when he receives a message from Brian.

 _'All is good? What are your plans for today?_  
_I thought today would be a good day to send you these. They might come in useful._  
_[Youtube link1]_  
_[Youtube link2]'_

In any other circumstances, Javi would have left the links for later. But the thumbnail makes him stop breathing.

It's Yuzu.

A beautiful Yuzu crouching on the floor as if it were the starting position of a dance.

What.... how? How could Yuzu be a dancer famous enough to have over a MILLION views and Javi not know him?? Javi snatches his headphones, takes a deep breath and takes a seat. 

Yuzuru glides up to his feet. The music is dark and mysterious, just like his costume. At first Javi thinks it's an elegant velvet outfit, tight around his strong muscles and with a wide open chest. But then the camera zooms in and Javi notices black feathers and occasional glitter transitionning from the dark material to shining directly on his skin.

Javier can't breathe. Is this an angel? A fallen angel maybe.

The camera displays two short feathers artfully mingling with his hair and then suddenly, Yuzuru leaps.

Javier mumbles a swearword when he sees Yuzu's feet.

Of course he's never seen this.

Yuzuru is a ballet dancer.

Yuzuru is Yuzuru Hanyu.

***

It's hard for Javi to get back to his senses. That dance is one of the most beautiful ones he has ever seen. He suddenly feels stupid for never watching the ballet performances acquaintances had sent to him. He'd always told himself ballet wasn't his thing. But maybe he simply hadn't given it the time it deserved.

This discovery experience would have been perfect if Yuzu hadn't fainted seconds before the performance was supposed to be over. The audience had gasped and the curtain had abruptly fallen in the face of chaos.

Javi knows Yuzu is alive and (hopefully) well, but the sight stays terrifying. The fall had been ugly too... how can anyone fall in a safe position when they are unconscious?

Javier rubs his face and exhales. Can he watch this again? He's scared of what else he will notice now.

Inhale.

Exhale.

He thinks of Yuzu's tears from this morning. How different he is when he is at home versus on stage... but the only way Javier can help is if he understands part of what is wrong.

He clicks play again.

The moves are so graceful. And yet so strong. How can- _could_ Yuzu move like that with pointe shoes?

Javi shakes his head. How could Yuzuru compliment _his_ dancing when Yuzu himself could do _this_?? This is otherworldly and Javi is breathless, even during this second watch. Every detail is just as magical... except signs that Javi hadn't noticed at first. Pale skin that has nothing to do with makeup and signs of exhaustion. The performance doesn't suffer from it, Javi only notices because he has already seen dancers overwork themselves in the past.

He stops the video before the fall - seeing it once is enough - and he goes back to the beginning. 

Those were some pretty impressive leg muscles... and Javi can tell Yuzu doesn't have them anymore. He would have noticed them if that were the case.

He sighs. Why is the world unfair like this sometimes?

He checks the date of the video.

2019.12.24

Everything suddenly makes sense.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning : injury, but no details are given


	5. Chapter 5

Javi is lying down, all appetite gone. He's not even sure he wants to watch the second video now. What kind of Christmas gift is this? This was all planned, it's obvious.

He's not sure how he feels about Brian right now. Friend or foe?

He sighs. Of course, Brian is his friend. But why the hell would he do this to him?

 _'Why are you doing this to me?'_ he texts him.

There's immediately an incoming call, but Javi doesn't want to talk to him right now. Brian could have warned him instead of trapping him like this.

He takes a deep breath. He should stay calm, getting angry won't help anyone. But dammit, Brian could have at least given him more time to digest this content.

There's a second incoming call but Javi hangs up on him. 

He's still musing on watching the second video when there's a soft knock on the door.

"Javi? It's almost lunch-time. Get up!"

He closes his eyes and tries to pull himelf together. Yuzu sounds fine, and they can make today a good day.

***

Lunch goes well, Yuzu is back to laughing and Javi feels warmth expand in his chest. It almost makes him wonder if what he saw that morning was a dream. When crescent eyes meet his gaze, he sets aside all sad thoughts. If Yuzu is smiling, all is good.

"Do you have any plans for today?" Javi asks.

"Not really. If you're free, we can think of what we should cook tonight."

That's when inspiration hits Javi.

"How about we do someting traditionally Japanese tonight, and tomorrow I teach you paella?"

Yuzu's mouth hangs open for a few seconds. Of course, he must not have expected that.

"I mean... forget it if you're not interested. Japanese food is fine for me-"

"I do want paella!" Yuzu hastily replies. "Javi-paella. The one you said is delicious."

Javi snorts and shakes his head. Is this really the fallen angel he saw on his phone earlier? Oh, how Javi wants to hug him and help him fly again.

Javi swallows. 

Now _that_ wasn't a thought he had planned to have back when he was busy being angry at Brian. But how can he not want to make Yuzu get his wings back when he is presented with such an angelic being? Yuzu has been so kind to him since day 2, despite Javi being the one invading his space. And Javi is certain that Yuzu is not aware that Nobunari and Brian had organised this encounter on purpose. Or... does he know? Is that why he had sounded so angry on the phone during the first night?

Javi's heart sinks.

Yuzu is certainly not interested in working with him, then. If he was, he would've told Javi that he was a dancer. Maybe Yuzu thinks that anything other than ballet is not worth his attention.

"Hello? Javi, where did your head just go??"

Javi shakes his head.

"Sorry, I got distracted. I was..." he scrambles for a excuse. What would be believable?? "...thinking of my rare experiences with Japanese food. Nobunari said I should try KF-"

Yuzu groans.

"I don't want to listen to Nobu right now. Cooking isn't my best talent... I'll order something."

"And I'll share what is left of my Suntory Whiskey with you," Javi says, wanting to bring back his relaxing times.

"I don't drink."

Javi shrugs. That isn't enough to make him drop it.

"Well maybe I'll convince you to have a sip tonight."

Yuzu rolls his eyes and Javi has to use all his mental strength to refrain from ruffling his hair. Because Yuzu is adorable, it's a fact. He's allowed to think that as often as he wants, thank you very much.

***

The sushi Yuzu has ordered must be top quality, Javi isn't sure he even recognizes all the fish species. They have decided to settle on the sitting room's couch for dinner and watch Javi's Yuna Kim DVD. One "Kampaii" later, Javi is brave enough to tease Yuzu, in the hope of bringing him out of his shell.

"Ok, well now that you know who I _respectfully_ admire, I want to know who you do that for."

Yuzu doesn't reply and takes another sip instead. Javi is almost giving up on getting an answer when seconds later, Yuzu bites his lip and smirks.

"Plushenko."

The name feels vaguely familiar but Javi isn't sure he knows who this is.

"Yagudin, too. Johnny Weir," Yuzu adds.

Javier knows who Johnny is, despite not being into ballet. They talk about what Yuzu enjoys about ballet performances and Javi thinks back to the video he saw that morning. Of course the man would be passionate about details.

Javi is curious about this Plushenko guy... and kind of jealous, to be honest. Yuzu is obviously head over heels for him. More whisky, more sushi, and Javi decides to investigate further.

"Show me. This Plushenko."

Yuzu's excited grin is endearing, but Javi almost feels guilty when he realises Yuzu is getting tipsy as he he goes fetch his phone. But he's an adult... he knows what he's doing. Once Yuzu is back, he sits closer and Javi is more than happy to welcome him by his side. Javi would watch any person Yuzu admires if that would keep them cosily settled like this under dim lighting.

Plushenko is on his screen in black and gold, and sure, that guy is talented... but Javi is distracted by the way Yuzu is watching him, all starry-eyed. Life really isn't fair, huh?

"Have you ever met him?"

Yuzu hums non-committally, probably not willing to reveal just how well he knows the world of ballet.

"I watched this performance every single day when I was a kid. He's just... perfect. My role model."

Does Yuzu even realise what he just said?

"Just a role model?" Javi asks, emboldened both by the whisky and by the impression that Yuzu seems inclined to open up a bit more.

Yuzu blushes and stays quiet for a few moments.

"Let's say... he was my Leonardo Dicaprio."

Javi grins and Yuzu seems slightly unsettled by his reaction.

"What?"

"Oh, nothing. Leo was a pretty hot Romeo, so... I get the feeling."

There, Javi has said it.

Well - implied it.

 _You're not the only one who enjoys men, Yuzu_ and dammit, Javi wishes he was the one Yuzu was looking at on his phone at night.

Yuzu's grin is spreading and Javi is pretty sure he's blushing.

"That's good to know, Javi," he says and tucks himself closer against Javi's side. "I'll show you my favorite Johnny Weir performance, and then I want to know who your favorite men are."

Javi needs to close his eyes for a second. What is he getting himself into?


	6. Chapter 6

The only videos Javi can think of showing Yuzu are movie exerpts or bits of music videos. He's not sure what to pick and none of the videos he's enjoyed watching seems right. To make things worse he also has a hard time concentrating on the task at hand because every time he muses about which dancer he could show Yuzu, the first image that comes to mind is Yuzuru Hanyu himself. It's as if he's invaded his mind.

"Do you... not like dancers?" Yuzu asks when it becomes obvious that Javi isn't picking something to watch, and Javi chuckles. He however tries to get back to his senses. _Try not to say something stupid,_ Javi tells himself.

But in the end he can't help it. Because fuck it, subtlety isn't his talent.

"I do like some dancers. But there is something I have to say. I noticed that my Malaguena video wasn't on your list," he teases. And no, this isn't something stupid to say... even though Yuzu hits his arm in response.

"Of course Malaguena is not on my list. I can't show you a video of yourself if you don't send it to me," the younger replies, and is that a blush?

"I want pretty Javi on my phone," he adds after a breath.

Aaahh how can this man be both seductive and adorable at the same time? Javi wants to groan, but stares at him with a quivering smile instead. It takes Javi a few moments to be able to talk again. Because damn... did Yuzu really just say _pretty Javi_ or are his drinks making him imagine things?

"Well, pretty Yuzu, give me your phone number then."

Javi feels like his hair is standing on end when he hands Yuzu his phone. Yuzu however doesn't look nervous. Is that what being famous does to people? Yuzu types his number and stays close to him after returning the phone. His arm is hooked with Javi's as he watches him send the video he wants and thanks him with a content hum.

Now what? Yuzu isn't moving. Does he feel the racket inside Javi's chest or-? His musing is interrupted when Yuzu gently tugs at his sleeve. The spaniard is still wondering what the right thing to ask would be when Yuzu's gentle touch moves to his fingers.

Oh.

Javi turns his palm up to welcome his touch. This isn't something he'd expected. Fingers interlaced, a gentle brush, a light squeeze. Javi nervously licks his lip. Would it be too much if he lifted Yuzu's hand to kiss it?

"Yuzu..." Javi says to make him look up, his heart in his throat. He doesn't usually overthink this kind of thing, but he can't say he's familiar with Yuzu yet. Hell, he doesn't even know what kind of flirting would be considered acceptable in Japan. Squeezing Yuzu's hand back feels like the right first step. Should they get some more whiskey, as a nudge in the direction they are possibly both considering?

"What?"

Lost in his thoughts, Javi had already forgotten that he'd said Yuzu's name. He grasps for a topic, anything, to avoid losing this moment. If their previous topic was to watch pretty men-

"Show me your favorite dance."

Yuzu blinks.

"What do you mean?"

"I don't know," Javi shrugs and nervously licks his lip again. Considering the cosy atmosphere, maybe this would be a perfect occasion to gently break the ice. "Tell me what you like to dance to the most." 

Javi gently squeezes Yuzu's hand again for good measure. But then Yuzu is frowning and Javi realises that no, there is no such thing as gently breaking the ice. Damned drinks and the bad ideas they bring... or just damned brain. Because he can't put this all on the little whiskey he has had up to now.

Yuzu's hand disentagles from his. _Fuck_. Is it too late to backpedal? Yuzu's arm has now left his side and Javi internally curses himself.

"Do you like dancing?" Javi asks, trying to make things light. Maybe if he pretends he was just talking about dancing in general- 

No, it doesn't seem to work because Yuzu is suddenly looks very tired, all warmth gone from his face.

"Not anymore. Why are you asking?"

"I don't know-"

Javi internally kicks himself. Maybe he should have accepted Brian's calls to know more about what he was stepping into.

"You are lying. You _do_ know."

"No, I-"

Yuzu shakes his head irritably and before Javi has the time to process what is happening, Yuzu is getting up.

"You _knew_ I used to be a dancer and pretended not to know when you asked me what I do for a living. Why?!"

" _No_! I-"

Fury is back in Yuzu's eyes. Javi hadn't expected to ever meet that icy glare again. How did their Christmas Eve go from innocent flirting to this? 

"You know what?" Yuzu says, "I don't want to know. I'm going to bed."

And with those words, he stomps away to the kitchen. The unsaid request is for Javi to get out of his way, so Javi decides to respect that, despite the pain it causes him.

At 2am that night, Javi tries to soothe himself with music on his phone and he notices that Yuzu is still online. He sighs. He can't force Yuzu to talk if he doesn't want to, so he decides to leave him alone. Instead, he opens up Youtube to look up other ballet performances of his.

Despite the current situation, it warms his heart to see his evolution, from a kid full of chaotic (but still graceful) energy to an adult able to control each and every movement. Both sides are a beautiful sight. Calculated or not, art stays art. The more he watches, the harder it is for Javi to believe that all the fire within Yuzu is gone. Maybe his foot doesn't let him dance ballet anymore, but he would certainy be able to dance another kind of choreography, if he found something that would match his tastes. Javi is no ballet expert, but Yuzu had seemed to enjoy experimenting with unusual music choices and style combinations. He applied ballet technique to pieces Javi would never have imagined to see danced to with pointe shoes. And then, Yuzu also danced to classic pieces. Javi knows it isn't the night that is giving him goosebumps, but the man's exquisite talent.

Watching his moves quickly becomes addictive, but Javi's energy has limits. Exhaustion finally takes him over and lets Javi greet sleep, despite the feelings of regret that torment him.

Tomorrow is another day, maybe Javi can let himself keep a sliver of hope.


End file.
